Not sure what to write on the card?
Selecting a gift can be tricky enough, knowing what to write on the card, can be particularly difficult. That’s why I have created this page, designed to provide some message-writing inspiration.
These wording suggestions aren’t provided to be scripts. It’s important that whatever you write on the card is genuine and heart-felt. Yet reading through these examples might inspire you to come up with your own version.
It can help to identify the examples below that most resonate, combine them, then adapting the language to align to your own voice.
A gentle reminder also, that saying something will always be more helpful than saying nothing. The fact you are sending a gift and taking the time to send a card with a personalised message on, will in itself be appreciated and experienced as supportive. You don’t need to overthink what you write.
Keeping it simple
Short, safe, and always appropriate. These acknowledge the loss without trying to fix it.
- “Sending you love, today and always.”
- “Thinking of you at this difficult time.”
- “I know how much they mean to you.”
- “I know you two were incredibly close.”
- “I just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you, now more than ever.”
- “You are so loved.”
- “Thinking of you and sending all my love.”
- “I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this.”
- “I wish I could take away your pain.”
When you don’t know what to say (and want to be honest)
These can be incredibly relieving for people to read.
- “Words seem so insufficient right now. I just want you to know I’m here.”
- “I don’t have the right words, I just want you to know that I care deeply and that I’m here.”
- “I’m here with you, even when words fall short.”
Messages that offer presence (not solutions)
These are especially helpful in longer-term grief.
- “I’m here, now, and in the days ahead.”
- “Know that you don’t have to go through this alone.”
- “I’m here whenever you want company, or quiet.”
- “You’re not alone. Know that I’m here.”
For anniversaries, birthdays, or hard days
- “Remembering [insert name of person who has died] with you today.”
- “I’m thinking of you, today especially.”
- “Know that I will be lighting a candle for you both on [insert day of the week].”
- “I know today may be heavy, I’m thinking of you.”
- “You and [insert name of person who has died] are very much in my thoughts this week.”
Sharing memories
- “I will always treasure the time I spent with [name of the person who has died]. I remember when [share a memory]”
Remember: While we can spend hours trying to think of the ‘right’ thing to say or write, there is no perfect thing to say after a loss. What matters most is showing that you care.
